


The Maid Effect

by TariSirfalas



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Crossdressing, HRE is Germany, M/M, Slow Updates, Unfinished
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-11-18
Updated: 2012-11-18
Packaged: 2017-11-19 00:23:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/566964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TariSirfalas/pseuds/TariSirfalas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Hungary gives Italy an old maid outfit from the past, Germany starts to regain memories of his childhood whenever he wears it. As the pieces of his memory come together, so do their feelings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hungary's Secret Plan

Germany sat back in his chair and rubbed his temples. The world’s conference yet again proved to be a fruitless endeavor. He could tell even though it was only a little way through. When England and France started exchanging blows, Germany had slammed his fist on the table and demanded that the meeting be adjourned for a short recess so that everyone could calm their nerves. It was agreed.

He sighed as he watched most of the other countries leave the spacious meeting room. At least he could get a few moments’ peace. Even though Italy had remained in his seat beside Germany, he was contentedly drawing on a piece of paper from Germany’s notepad.

“Italy,” a soft voice said. Germany looked over to see Hungary leaning over Italy’s shoulder.

“Miss Hungary!” Italy exclaimed, jumping out of his seat and hugging her. “I haven’t seen you in a while! When did you get here? You weren’t at the meeting.”

“Austria forgot some of his notes at home so I brought them for him,” she replied. She pet Italy on the head. “I also have a surprise for you.”

Italy gasped and beamed up at her. “Eh? What is it Miss Hungary?”

She held out an old pink box and winked. “I found some of your old clothes in my attic. I think they still fit you. Let’s surprise everyone when they come back!” 

“That sounds like fun!” he exclaimed, bouncing towards the door with a huge grin on his face. Hungary gave Germany a mysterious look before trotting behind him.

Germany raised his eyebrow in curiosity. Hungary had a weird habit of giving him that look whenever he was with Italy, but today she seemed a little more mischievous. He wondered what Italy’s old clothes looked like. He vaguely recalled Italy telling him he used to be Austria’s servant with Hungary a few hundred years ago, so maybe they were old Austrian-style servant clothes. Why was Hungary so interested seeing Italy in clothes like that? It might lighten the mood of the meeting, however, so Germany let the matter pass.

Ten minutes later, the meeting was about to continue when Italy burst into the room followed closely behind by Hungary, who was beaming from ear to ear.

“Look everyone!” Italy called out, twirling around. “It’s my old clothes from when Mr. Austria thought I was a girl!”

“Well, I—” Austria stammered while the other countries snickered, half at Italy and half at Austria.

Germany felt an ache grow in his chest as he stared at Italy. A maid’s outfit? He should be raising his eyebrow at Italy’s strange attire, but instead he found his cheeks reddening and his heartbeat thumping. Was he becoming ill?

“You’re so cute, my little Italy!” Hungary exclaimed, clapping her hands together. Italy blushed as the other countries laughed.

Germany clutched his head as a sharp pain shot through his brain. He had heard Hungary say that before…. He tried to focus on what was happening, but when he looked at Italy again, he began breathing heavier and heavier. What was happening to him?

“Hey, Germany! What do you think?” Italy asked, hopping towards him.

“I…” His vision was blurring. “I—” As he tried to get up from his chair, his legs collapsed from under him. 

“Germa—!” he heard Italy scream before he hit the floor and everything faded to black.

\------------------------

“What’s the matter with Germany?” Italy cried as Spain and England carried his friend’s unconscious form to a nearby lounge chair.

“Don’t worry about it, Italy,” France tried to reassure him. “Germany is probably just not feeling well.”

“But Germany is never sick!” Italy wailed. Austria came up in front of him and crossed his arms. “Germany will be fine. Why don’t you change out of those clothes now?”

“Yes sir, Mr. Austria,” Italy obeyed, walking gloomily out of the room.

As soon as he left, Austria turned to Hungary. “Why did you bring that outfit with you?” 

“I just thought that Italy would enjoy wearing it one more time. I didn’t know it would stir that much of a reaction from Germany.”

“No, I know what you were doing,” Austria scolded, wagging a finger at her. “You thought that if Germany saw Italy in that dress again it would make him remember something. Maybe you didn’t mean to make him faint, but you certainly caused quite a reaction from him.”

“Do you suppose he’ll remember something when he wakes up?” France asked, looking back at Germany.

“We’ll just have to wait and see,” Austria said, furrowing his brow with concern as he placed his hand on his chin. 

\-------------------------

Italy placed the maid outfit on the bed next to the pink box and started to put on his military uniform. Even though he was worried about Germany, he couldn’t help smiling at the green dress. Looking at it brought back so many memories. After buttoning his suit, he carefully folded the old cloth and put it back in the box. He wondered if Hungary would let him keep it. It was the only thing left that reminded him of those days at Mr. Austria’s house with Holy Roman Empire. He squeezed the box slightly. Holy Rome…

He was shaken from his thoughts when a soft knock came from the door.

“Are you done, Italy?” Hungary called from the door.

“Yeah. You can come in,” he said, picking up the box and turning towards the door. Hungary smiled sympathetically as she walked towards him. “The meeting is over. They can’t really continue without Germany so they adjourned. Austria volunteered to drive Germany home and look after him until he gets better. “

She reached out her hands for the box. “I’ll take this back, I suppose.” Italy held the box slightly closer and looked down at it as she reached.

“You want to keep it?” He nodded silently. She seemed taken aback for a moment, and then smiled. “Go ahead. It will make a fun costume if nothing else.”

“Thanks, Miss Hungary!” he exclaimed, suddenly cheering up. He started to bounce towards the door. “I’m going to help Germany with Mr. Austria. Germany and I have an alliance, after all!”

\--------------------------

_Germany walked through the tall grass, enjoying the warm sun on his small face. He wasn’t sure how he had gotten here or why he was the size of a child, but somehow that didn’t matter right now. He saw a quiet lake as he reached the top of a hill and strolled towards it. He knew he was wearing some sort of black cloak, but he was curious to see what they looked like on him._

_He held his breath slightly as he looked down at the placid surface of the water. As he thought, he was in the body of a small child, although he still looked like himself. Same hair, same blue eyes, same serious expression. Perhaps this was what he looked like as a child. He didn’t much like the outfit or the hat on his head, but it seemed almost familiar to him._

_“Holy Rome?” he heard a soft voice behind him. Turning around, he saw…_

_“Italy?” His child-like voice surprised him, but not as much as seeing Italy, standing a few feet away with a bucket of water in hand. Italy was a child as well and dressed in that green maid uniform. He seemed almost…pretty. Like an innocent girl. He felt his cheeks blush as Italy came closer._

_“Holy Rome, Mr. Austria said to come home. It’s time to—ah!” Germany suddenly leapt towards Italy, grabbing the tiny country’s other hand._

_“Italy…” Germany stared at the feminine face with as much intensity as he could muster. Italy at that moment looked so weak, shy, and defeated. He wanted to protect this country, lead her away from this servitude. “Italy, I—“_

_“Germany!” Italy suddenly exclaimed, smiling. Germany took a step back in confusion. Not only was Italy calling him by his real name now, but his voice was slightly deeper, more like a boy’s. “Germany!” he yelled again. The beautiful landscape around him began to shimmer away to white._

\-----------------------

“Germany!” Italy’s child-like face faded away, replaced by his slightly more masculine face of the present. Germany blinked wildly, his mind in a daze. He slowly began to register his surroundings, beginning with the fact that Italy was sitting on him, his smiling face only a few inches away from his.

“Yay! You’re awake, Germany!”

“Yes,” he sighed. “Now would you kindly get off me?”

“Oh, sorry,” Italy apologized, sliding off his chest and sitting down in a chair beside the bed. “Austria is here too. He went to make some food so I decided to wake you up. Are you feeling better?”

“My head hurts, but other than that, I seem to be fine.” He sat up in bed and rubbed his temples. “I had a very strange dream…”

“What was it about?” Italy asked, suddenly very curious.

“Well, I dreamed I was a child, walking around this beautiful land filled with flowers and tall grass. It was so vivid. And…” He furrowed his brow, trying to remember. “And you were there, Italy, dressed in that maid outfit from the meeting. You called me something different, though. What was it you said? Ho-Holy Rome?”

“Eh?” Italy’s face fell and he shot up from the chair. “B-but…” He started trembling. “Holy Roman Empire…he’s dead.” There was a tense moment of silence as Germany and Italy stared at each other.

Suddenly, Austria came into the room carrying a tray. “Oh, you’re awake, Germany. Hav—“

“Mr. Austria!” Italy suddenly yelled, running over to him and bouncing up and down in fright. “Germany said he dreamed that he was Holy Rome! And it was exactly like it was back then! But Holy Rome is gone! What’s going on?”

Austria stood speechless for a moment, looking from Italy to Germany with wide, surprised eyes.

“Your face tells me you’re hiding something.” Germany said, studying Austria. “I’m not sure what it is, but you had better spill the beans.” He folded his arms and glared at him.

Austria sighed, closing his eyes for a minute. “Very well,” he agreed, opening his eyes again. “I suppose it’s time to tell you two the truth.” He nodded at Italy. “You might want to sit down,” he told him. “This will take a bit of explaining.


	2. Hidden History

Austria took a chair from a desk on the wall and carried it to the end of the bed. He sighed as he sat down. “I’m not sure how to begin,” he said, rubbing his hands together.

“Then you can start with my question,” Germany ordered. “Who is this Holy Roman Empire?”

Taken aback for a moment, Austria’s mind seemed to be working at record speed. At last, he took a deep breath and said, “He was a country that idolized the great Roman Empire so much that he decided to name himself the ‘Holy’ Roman Empire and started a conquest of the world. He wanted to become even more powerful than the Roman Empire and be the greatest country in the world. Even though he was only a child, he gained many territories, including myself and Hungary.”

“Really?” Germany said, impressed. “Why haven’t I heard of him before?” 

“Let me finish,” Austria responded, pointing a finger at him. “One of his main goals, as you can imagine, was to conquer Rome, the heart of the Roman Empire. He never did, but he managed to get Northern Italy from taking my territories.” He nodded curtly at Italy.

Germany glanced at Italy also. He didn’t seem to be paying attention and his eyes shone with a sad faraway look in them. Germany wondered why Italy had never mentioned his former conqueror before.

“Holy Rome…” Italy suddenly murmured, coming out of his stupor. “He…he loved me.” Italy was looking down at the floor and smiling, though his eyes still looked very sad. Germany stared at Italy in awe. Reading the atmosphere, he could somehow tell that Italy had not spoken about this in a long time.

“He loved me,” Italy repeated. “Even though he could be scary sometimes, he was nice to me.” He paused to wipe a tear from the corner of his eye with his palm. “Then one day, he asked me to come with him to fight a war, saying that together we could be even stronger than Grandpa Rome. But…but I said no and he went off to war anyway…” He sniffled. “I saw him a few more times when he came to visit, but at one point he suddenly stopped coming.” Italy gripped his pants above the knee and fell silent.

“What happened to him?” Germany asked Austria.

“The end of that war, the Thirty Years War, had left him basically powerless. Most of his territories gained independence, such as myself and Hungary. Italy, you were still under my rule so you didn’t notice much. Prussia supported him, as well as that idiot could, but then France got himself a new boss, Napoleon. He picked an easy fight with Holy Rome and won.”

“Eh? But Austria, you told me he died from that Thirty Years War thing! What did Big Brother France do to him? Italy cried, shaking.

“Is that how he died?” Germany guessed.

Austria sighed, closing his eyes. “No,” he replied. “He didn’t die.” He opened his eyes and stared apologetically at Italy. “I’m sorry that I lied to you, Italy. At the time, I thought I was protecting you. I don’t think you could have handled it.”

“Wh-what do you mean?”

Austria furrowed his brow. “I’m not exactly sure of the details, but Napoleon did something to Holy Rome when he conquered him. It was as though he was brainwashed. He was renamed the Confederacy of the Rhine and he fought alongside Napoleon like some kind of robot soldier until Napoleon fell a few years later. France told me he had nothing to do with it, whatever it was. Usually I don’t trust his word, but that time, he seemed…regretful.” Austria’s hands, which had been folded in his lap, clenched for a brief moment.

“What happened to Holy Rome?” Italy cried, trembling with emotion.

After a pause, Austria continued. “After Napoleon fell, it seemed that whatever he had done wore off. The problem was that he couldn’t remember a thing, not even that he had been controlled. We weren’t sure what to do with him, until Prussia agreed to take him in and rehabilitate him. We agreed.” Austria cleared his throat nervously and smirked. “He was his older brother after all.”

“Hold on,” Germany interrupted, a realization dawning on him. “Just what are you saying?”

There was a long minute of silence as Austria and Germany stared at each other. Italy looked back and forth between the two countries, looking distressed and confused.

Finally, Austria took a deep breath. “Germany,” he stated, squaring his shoulders. “You were once the Holy Roman Empire.”

Italy felt his skin tingle as Austria’s words sunk in.

“Wh-what?”

Austria sighed. “I know this must be quite a lot for you two to digest at once, but now that you know the truth, you must understand—“

Germany folded his arms and closed his eyes. “This makes sense, actually.”

“Germany?” Italy murmured.

“I’ve never been able to remember my childhood. My earliest memories were of myself as a teenager living with _bruder_. If what you say is true, Austria, this gives me a bit of closure, actually.”

Suddenly, Austria’s cell-phone began to ring to the tune of a classical symphony. With an apologetic nod, he flipped it open and read the text. He gave an irritated sigh. “I’m sorry to leave you like this, but my boss says he wants to see me. I’ll be back later. Call me if you have any more questions.” 

As soon as Austria closed the door, Italy got out of his chair and crawled on top of Germany’s lap.

“Italy? What are you¬—“ Germany stammered as Italy reached for his head, a solemn look on his usually cheery face. He needed to check this for himself…

“Let me see…” Italy murmured, grabbing Germany’s cheeks and pinching them. For a few minutes, Italy silently poked and prodded his face, twisting it in odd shapes. Germany started to blush as Italy’s face leaned closer and closer. Suddenly, Italy saw it. It was only faint, but as Germany stared at him, he thought he could see Holy Rome’s blushing face.

“It’s true!” Italy yelled, letting go of Germany’s face and wrapping his arms around him. The joy that he felt was overwhelming and he began to sob into Germany’s chest. “I still don’t understand it, but it’s true!” He squeezed tighter. “…Holy Rome…”

“Did he—did I really mean that much to you?” Germany asked quietly. Italy nodded silently and dug his head deeper into Germany’s chest. He still felt like the same Germany Italy had already known, but now it was like a light had been turned on in his brain. Italy recalled the way Germany glared, how he blushed, how his lips felt against his cheek when he greeted him. They were so much alike, how did he not notice?

“I…I’m sorry,” Germany apologized, placing a hand on Italy’s head. “I can’t remember any of it…I wish I could.”

“But that dream you had was so accurate!” Italy responded, lifting his head to look up at Germany.

Germany was silent for a moment, thinking. “I have an idea,” he said finally. “This might seem weird, but I believe that seeing you in that maid outfit caused some sort of reaction that gave me that memory. Maybe…maybe if I saw you in it again, I could remember more.” He blushed again.

Italy’s face lit up instantly. “I still have it with me!” he exclaimed, jumping off the bed. “I’ll go get it.”

“G-good,” Germany stammered. “I’ll wait here.” As he watched Italy bounce out of the room, his blush deepened. Even the anticipation of seeing that maid outfit on Italy caused his chest to tighten. Part of him was embarrassed by these uncontrollable reactions, but at the same time he felt that he was regaining a lost part of himself by feeling this way.

\---------------------------

In another bedroom, Italy patted out the wrinkles in the apron as he looked at himself in the mirror. A multitude of emotions were raging a war in his head. He was still a bit confused about Austria’s story. How could a country be brainwashed into forgetting its past? But it fit so well with Germany’s life. He started to imagine Germany wearing a large version of Holy Roman Empire’s black cloak. The thought caused his cheeks to redden and his skin to tingle. Of all the emotions he felt at that moment, the biggest was joy. Joy on having discovered the truth, joy being able to help Germany remember, and despite the occasional cold breeze that brushed past, joy on being able to wear the maid outfit once again.

As he walked back down the hallway towards Germany’s room, he wondered what kinds of things Germany would remember first. Suddenly, he had an idea. He reached for the closet door…

\---------------------------

Germany sat on the end of the bed with his arms folded stiffly. This whole situation was so strange and confusing. He closed his eyes. He had resolved to deal with it the same way he did everything else: with hard work and strong determination. He would regain his memories at a fast, steady pace. This was the only way to control the situation. All he had to count on was Italy…Another vision of a sun-filled valley crossed his mind at the mention of friend’s name. His heartbeat flittered for a moment and a stab of pain shot through his brain. He grimaced, rubbing his temples. Yes, he needed all the control he could get…

Germany almost jumped when he heard a knock on the door.

“Germany! It’s m-me!” he heard Italy call nervously. “Are…are you ready?”

The blond-haired nation squared his shoulders and set a determined stare on his face. “Yes,” he stated. “Come in.”

Italy opened the door slowly and peeked his head in, blushing furiously. “I-I’m coming in to clean,” he stammered, shuffling in with a broom in his shaking hands. He began to push the broom across the floor, nervously glancing at Germany every few seconds.

Before Germany could ask what on Earth he was doing, he felt a wave of dizziness hit him. He gave a gasp of pain and clutched his head. Italy immediately stopped cleaning and rushed over to the bed.

“Germany! Is it working? Are you remembering?”

“Italy…” Germany murmured, one of his eyes closed in pain. “Wh-at was that? What were you doing?”

Italy held onto one of his arms. “I had the idea of acting out some of the stuff I used to do at Austria’s house.” He blushed again. “That was how I always acted whenever I was told to sweep in Holy Ro-, I mean, your room.”

The worst of the pain subsiding, Germany closed his eyes. Suddenly, he was able to see it.

\-------------------------------

_There was a tiny knock on the door. Holy Rome looked up from the book he was reading on his bed._

_“Come in,” he called. He gasped quietly as he saw little Italy come in the room, dragging a push broom twice as tall as her._

_“I-I’m coming in to clean,” she announced nervously. She carried the broom to a corner of his bedroom and began sweeping._

_“Italy!” Holy Rome yelled, a bit louder than he meant to._

_“Y-yes?” she responded, shaken._

_“Y-you don’t need to sweep today,” he replied. Italy shouldn’t be doing so much work, he thought to himself, blushing. “You just did yesterday.”_

_“B-but…” Italy held the broom tighter. “Mr. Austria told me to sweep.”_

_“O-oh,” Holy Rome murmured. He quickly buried his face in his book to hide his blushing face. “Okay. Co-continue then…”_

\--------------------------------

“Italy?” Germany said, opening his eyes. “I think I remember…some.”

“You do?” Italy exclaimed, beaming. “Hooray! I’m so happy!”

“I have one question, however.” Germany studied Italy’s face. “Why were you so afraid of me during those times?”

Italy blushed, smiling. “Because you were so intimidating…you’ve always been very intimidating.” He laughed. “I’m still scared of you sometimes! Especially during training.”

“I suppose that explains it,” Germany concluded. There was an odd moment of silence. “What should we try next?”

“Hmm…” Italy played with one his sleeve ruffles as he thought. Germany blushed. “Aha!” Italy suddenly yelled, pulling on Germany’s arm. “I know! We can go to that place!”

“What place?” Germany asked as he let himself be led out of his bedroom.

“You’ll see!” Italy said, almost singing the words. He looked back at Germany and winked. “It’s a surprise!”


	3. Confessions

Germany sighed as the car came to a stop. It was always nerve-racking when he let Italy drive, but this time Germany could not stop staring at the strange sight of the cross-dressing nation weaving through traffic at unsafe speeds, his white handkerchief blowing in the wind. It had not been an entirely unpleasant experience, he admitted, although he was still relieved when he planted his feet on the ground. He looked around.

“Where are we?” he asked. Italy had parked his little red sports car on a wide, gravel patch on the side of the road. It seemed to be designed for cars to stop there, and rightfully so, because just beyond the road, a beautiful green meadow rolled across the hills, its long grass swaying softly in the breeze. He was suddenly reminded of his dream.

“Are we near Austria’s house?” By way of reply, Italy winked and put a finger to his lips silently. He took Germany by the hand and led him happily through the warm grass.

They were silent for a few minutes, during which Germany studied the landscape. These were definitely the fields from that dream. As they walked further and further from the road, the sounds of modern-day faded away, replaced by the small chirping of birds and the sound of sweeping grass.

“It’s around here somewhere,” Italy said, scanning the horizon. 

“What is?” Germany asked, hoping for a more definite answer this time. Italy just turned his head to smile at him, a warm, knowing smile. Instantly, Germany felt his apprehension fall away. He felt that wherever it was that Italy was leading him, it would be alright. 

Very soon, a small brick shed came into view. It was no bigger than a closet. What a strange location, Germany thought, out here in the middle of a field. As they came closer, he could see that the shed was very old, perhaps several hundred years old.

“I haven’t been here in a while,” Italy admitted, fiddling with the lock on the wooden door. “So it might be a little dusty.”

“What’s a storage shed doing way out here?” Germany wondered out loud. 

“Well, Hungary had this built a long time ago so that I could have a place to paint when I wasn’t working. I used to come here all the time, even after I grew up. It’s such a pretty spot to sit and paint!”

At last, Italy succeeded in opening the shed door and the two nations went inside. Everything was covered with a fine coating of dust, just as Italy had warned. The floor was stacked with paint buckets of all sizes and on the back wall hung all sorts of brushes, all of which looked well used.

“I keep a couple paintings here too, mainly because I’d be too embarrassed to explain them to people if they saw them at my house.” Italy smiled bashfully. He lifted up a cloth tarp in the corner, causing some dust to rise up in the air. There was a small stack of canvases lined against the wall which Italy began shuffling through. “Here’s a good one,” he decided at last, pulling it out and showing it to Germany. A small boy with piercing blue eyes looked out from the canvas, dressed in a dark cloak. He stood in the tall grass, a slight blush on his cheeks.

“That proves it then,” Germany said, taking the painting from Italy and holding it up. “That was no ordinary dream I had.”

“You saw yourself?” 

“Through a reflection, yes,” Germany responded. As he stared at the painting, he suddenly felt a dull ache grow in the back of his head. A memory must be coming back, he thought, and closed his eyes in anticipation.

\------------------------------

_“Hold still, please,” Italy ordered softly from the other side of the canvas. Holy Rome straightened his spine and stiffened his expression. Italy peaked over the side of the easel and giggled. “You don’t have to do that,” she laughed. “Just relax.”_

_He felt his blush deepen. “Okay. I’ll do as you say.”Italy turned her attention back to the canvas and he breathed out slightly. Even after all the time he’s spent with her, the slightest glance caused his heart to pound in his chest. He tried to concentrate on his pose. This painting was important…_

_A few more minutes passed by. “Is it done yet?” he asked. He needed to see it, to see his likeness as painted by his beloved’s hands._

_“Just a little bit…” Italy muttered. He heard the sound of a few more careful brush strokes and then the clank of the paintbrush resting on the aisle. “Finito!” she exclaimed, beaming at him. He couldn't help but smile back…_

\------------------------------

“What is it, Germany?” Italy asked.

“I think…I remember when you painted this,” Germany answered, opening his eyes. “I remember standing there and I kept thinking that this painting was going to be important, but I don’t know why.”

Italy smiled a little sadly and gingerly took the painting back. “I said that I needed practice painting portraits and you volunteered. You looked so happy when I finished it, I asked Austria to hang it in your study.” He turned back to the wall. “That was only a month before…the war.” He stood silently for a moment.

Germany took a step closer. “Italy,” he murmured.

“It’s okay. I’m fine,” Italy replied, bending down to lean the painting back up against the wall with the others. He whipped back around to face Germany, a huge smile on his face. “Let’s go walk around the field! It’s so pretty this time of year!”

Germany followed Italy out of the shed, a look of suspicion on his face. That smile wasn’t the genuine one he was used to. There must be something Italy wasn’t telling him.

The landscape seemed to welcome them back outside. The warm breeze brushed past their cheeks and made Italy’s dress rustle. _“Ve, bello,”_ Italy sighed, holding his arms out as if to hug the horizon. He ran up a little ahead, his arms still out to the side and twirled around. “Come on, Germany! Let’s go for a walk! It’s too pretty not to!”

Germany sighed. Maybe he was just imagining things. “Alright,” he conceded, walking towards the cross-dressing nation. “But only for a little bit. It will get dark soon.”

For a while, Germany strolled behind as Italy frolicked in the tall grass. Every so often he would bend down to pick up another flower. Soon he had a small bouquet of wildflowers. “Look how pretty they are, Germany!” he exclaimed as he paused at the top of a hill. He knelt down in the grass to pick one more. “We should come here more often!”

There was that smile again. Something wasn’t right. “Italy,” Germany said as he reached the top of the hill. “What’s going on?” He stared down at the Italian who was still sitting in the flowers.

“What do you mean, Germany?” Italy’s smile faltered, revealing a little nervousness in his face.

“Your smile,” Germany replied. “It’s not the same…I can tell that something is wrong.”

Italy looked down at the grass in front of Germany’s feet. He was silent for a moment. “I’m just a little confused,” he said at last.

Germany knelt down in front of him. “About Austria’s confession?” he guessed. 

Italy nodded. Small tears had begun to form at the corner of his eyes. “And about other things…” He was quiet for another minute. “For a long time, I was told to believe that Holy Rome was dead, and I mostly did. I used to have dreams, though…” Italy’s eyes were becoming shimmery with emotion. “Dreams that one day he would come back and we would be reunited forever. For a while, that wish was the only thing that kept me going. I wanted to get stronger so that he could be proud of me when he returned. I think that was the only reason I was able to keep Turkey from beating me up.” He chuckled a little, putting a finger to his eye to wipe away a tear.

“When I got bigger, though, I sort of gave up on it. It was a childish fantasy…” He sniffled. “B-but then today, I suddenly find out that Holy Rome is alive and that we had already been reunited a long time ago. Thinking back, that definitely wasn’t the reunion I had been hoping for.”

Germany remembered that day as well. The tomato box, the pathetic pleading. An unusual reunion indeed. Italy continued, “You said you want to remember, b-but I know you’re only doing for me. I didn’t realize till we got here, b-but now I know that I only wanted you to remember so that I could have Holy Rome back…but I still want you to be Germany too.” By now, tears were streaming down his face. He looked up at Germany. “Am I being selfish, Germany?”

Germany’s eyes softened as Italy asked the question. He knew that most of what he had said was true, but not everything… “Nein,” he answered, grabbing the other’s shoulders. “You’re not. You forget, for a long time there was an empty spot in my memory. Now I have a chance to fill it. I want to know more about myself. I-“

At that moment, as Germany stared at Italy’s tear-streaked face, he felt his pulse quicken and blood rush to his cheeks. A now familiar ache began to grow in the back of his head. “I…” The edges of his vision grew fuzzy and white. As the pain in his head grew, Italy’s face blurred and was replaced by a much younger version…

\------------------------------

_He saw her at the top of the hill, holding a broom. A determined look in his face, he strode towards her. “H-hey Italy,” he called, trying his hardest to sound casual._

_She jumped in fright like always. “Ah, Holy Rome,” she stammered, turning around. “I-I’m cleaning properly! I really am! So it’ll be alri-“_

_“Italy,” he interrupted, holding out his hand. “Won’t you become the Roman Empire with me? Let’s create the strongest country in the world together, just you and me.”_

_Taken aback by the question, Italy was silent for a moment. At last, she shook her head to the side, a sad look on her face. Shock and anger shook inside him. “W-what!?” he yelled. “You don’t want to waste your life away in a place like this, right?” Italy shrank back in fear, dropping her broom, but he continued. “You must’ve wanted to go back to the powerful Roman Empire too!”_

_His anger subsided and he immediately regretted his impulse to yell. Italy wiped of her eyes with one of her tiny fists. “B-but, Grandpa Rome was…He got too big, then…then he fell,” she said. Holy Rome was silent. Italy usually did not talk about Rome in front of him. “Grandpa had scars all over and they always looked so painful. I don’t want to see you like that. I don’t.”_

_Holy Rome felt his heart skip a beat. Did Italy have feelings for him, after all? Italy reached out for his hand. “Don’t become the Roman Empire,” she pleaded. “I like you best the way you are, so please…”_

_Holy Rome took a step back. This conversation wasn’t supposed to end up like this. She was supposed to leap up in his arms and gladly follow him. Why was she asking him the impossible? He couldn’t just abandon his ambition. In fact, he needed her to be by his side in order to fulfill that dream…Utter despair threatened to take control of his body, so with a twist of his body, he fled, not wanting his beloved to see the tears that began to flow from his eyes._

_~.~_

_He held the painting in his hands. It was the only painting he had managed to do well. It seemed fitting that it was of Italy, sleeping curled up on a chair. One of his soldiers had suggested that he leave it behind. Where they were going, paintings and other luxuries had little use. He contemplated leaving it too, but for a different reason. Would bringing this painting distract him from the battles ahead? Thinking of Italy already drove him mad…He lowered the painting from his face, and suddenly she was there, holding a bucket of water._

_“Ah,” he breathed out in shock. She wasn’t supposed to come. He couldn’t bear to say goodbye to her…_

_“Oh, Holy Rome, you’re here! Morning!” she exclaimed, walking towards him. She seemed relieved. She must have realized that he had left Austria’s house._

_“…eh, how!?” he stammered back, quickly whipping the painting behind his back. “H-how did you know where I…” His heart pounded in his chest. He couldn’t stand it. “S-stop!” he ordered. Don’t come any closer! Er…um, stay there!” He turned his face to the side, afraid to look at her. “I’ve no idea why’d you’d follow me, when you ran away if I came after you,” he murmured, half in resentment. Why was Italy so hard to figure out? But damn it if he didn’t worship the ground she tripped on…“I-I woke up extra early so I didn’t have to see you…” He would have to say something to her now that she’s here._

_“Holy Rome?” she mumbled, confused._

_“Look, Italy,” he began, staring straight at her face. “There’s something I have to tell you.” He gulped. His cheeks were probably bright red, he thought. “I-I’m…sorry for everything I did…” he apologized. “This is goodbye, so don’t worry…”_

_“W-what do you mean…?” she exclaimed._

_“I…I mean what I said.” At that moment, one of his soldiers appeared behind him and informed him that his carriage was almost there. Holy Rome handed him the painting to be packed. Italy seemed to understand what was happening from that announcement and she started shaking with emotion._

_“So long,” Holy Rome said. ”Stay well, alright?” He started to turn. It was taking all of his energy to move, to walk away._

_“Wh…Y-you’re really going? No…” he heard her cry. He clinched his fists, forcing himself to keeping moving towards his waiting carriage._

_“Holy Rome!” she yelled. The force of her call was so powerful that he immediately whipped back around. She held out a small bit of cloth. Those were… “I…I’ll give you this!” she offered. Tears glistened on the side of her face. “Take this, Holy Rome, and think of it as me.”_

_“W-what are you…” he stuttered. Italy’s panties!? This must be a confession of love! His hands were shaking as he took the warm cloth from her. “T-thank you…” he said. “I-I accept your feelings.” He should give her something too, but what? “Then I’ll also…W-what do your people give to their loved ones?”_

_“A…a kiss, I guess,” she answered._

_“I-I see…” he replied. The pounding in his chest was the loudest it had ever been. He willed himself to say it…“Ever since the 900s, I’ve always, always loved you.” He reached for her, puckering his lips…_

\-------------------------

“G-Germany? What are you…” he heard Italy stammer. Germany didn’t really know what he was doing either. He leaned forward, his head still full of confusing images from the past. Taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, he planted his lips on Italy’s. Instantly, he felt his body release all its tension. All there was now was joy. After a few seconds, he felt Italy return the kiss. His arms reached up slowly, wrapping themselves around Germany’s neck. Pure bliss.

All too quickly, their lips parted. Germany crumpled, leaning his head on Italy’s chest. “I…I remember now,” he explained. His face burned with sudden tears. “I remember the day I left you, Italy. I’m sorry…” Italy remained silent, but Germany felt his soft arms hold him tighter. “I’m so sorry…” 

They remained like that for a long time. At last, Germany lifted up his head. “I…I love you, Italy,” he confessed. New tears collected in the corners of his eyes. “I’m sorry it took me until now to realize it. I only know now just how much I did.”

“Germany…” Italy murmured, smiling. His eyes also sparkled with tears. “I love you too, Germany. And not just the Holy Rome you. I love the Germany you.”

¬-------------------------

“So cute…” Hungary whispered to herself happily. She adjusted the zoom on her binoculars. Suddenly, Austria rounded the corner in the hallway.

“What on Earth are you doing?” he asked. Hungary quickly straightened up from the window she had been crouching at and put on an innocent smile.

“Just bird-watching,” she lied, tilting her head to the side sweetly. 

Austria raised an eyebrow. “Really? You haven’t done that in years.”

“I just decided to pick it back up,” she said, shrugging. Austria seemed to find this explanation satisfactory and walked past her and into the piano room.

Hungary sighed with relief and returned to her position at the window. “Damn,” she murmured as she focused her binoculars. “They’re walking back down the hill.”


End file.
